blow my mind away with fake facts

america was and still is bad, because slavery (which only ever happened in america)! BUT its ok now because slavery is ended! this and this don't count.

or this

or this.

slavery- a thing that only happened in (evil) america, and is done and over.

My urine tastes horrible.

wrong thread?

Alfred Hitchcock fathered a child on each continent. He finally achieved this at age 70.

There are microscopic villages of humanites living inside everyone's ear canals. Listen, you can hear them now.

sardines are actually born in tin cans. as they reproduce, they eat each other and two sardines become the dominant predators. as they continue to fuck each other and eat their children, they get bigger and bigger until they don't have room to fuck. that's when they die, emit louisiana hot sauce, mustard, or oil from their arses depending on the genus specificos, and then scientists from walmart distribute the sardines all over america.

The total length (in inches) of your 2 arms and 2 legs, minus the length of your torso generally equals your IQ.

there is an inverse correlation between the average length of a movie and the average length of a book, year-to-year.

If you were to bring back a rock from the moon or find a meteorite, the radiation from space is enough to curdle milk quite rapidly into a fine cheese, or "moon cheese". Moon cheese is considered a rare delicacy and it was misconceptions of this process that led to the common saying of the moon being "made of cheese"

pornography was invented as an antidote to the chinese, or as they were known at the time, "the yellow plague".

there are only 312 original ideas left in the world.

sometimes on the space station a poop nugget will escape from the poop tube and slingshot into the cabin where it bounces and flies around grossing out all the astronauts until they can catch it or maybe it gets lost behind some equipment and they forget because it smells pretty bad in there anyways.

If you add every number from 1 to 100, you end up with infinity (this may or may not be true depending on your angle)

Right now nanobots are slowly and systematically replacing objects in our environment with components of a robot. When they are complete, this enormous robot will stand up and crush us all.

When you walk past mirrors in the dark crazed ghosts stare out at you from the other side, longing for your flesh, to re-enter the world of the living.

a can of pasta contains enough calories to make 4 super-models lose their jobs

A new study shows that 70% of Asians do indeed look the same

4 out of 5 pediatricians recommend that you give your little ones Lucky Strike cigarettes.

Lucky Strike, tell 'em "uncle Lucky sent ya"!

this message was brought to you by Lucky Strike, proud sponsor of the 1937 Olympic Games.

new boc album coming out soon !

We live in a computer simulation. This was recently confirmed by a NASA scientist.

hey sergeantk- you're in a desert. there's sand. you see a turtle coming at you. being a bastard, you flip it on it's back and just watch it squirming, trying to get back on its feet. what the fuck, sergeantk?

  On 1/29/2013 at 5:34 PM, MisterE said:

hey sergeantk- you're in a desert. there's sand. you see a turtle coming at you. being a bastard, you flip it on it's back and just watch it squirming, trying to get back on its feet. what the fuck, sergeantk?

  On 5/22/2012 at 10:49 PM, Root5 said:

We live in a democratic society.

each man is the architect of his own fate

Adolf Hitler and Barack Obama are the same height, weight, eye color, hair color, blood type and shoe size. Both are also left-handed.