in-laws

  On 7/29/2011 at 2:40 AM, Fred McGriff said:

  On 7/29/2011 at 1:58 AM, jules said:

  On 7/29/2011 at 12:21 AM, delet... said:

  On 7/28/2011 at 9:34 PM, Coalbucket PI said:

Did playing golf just become cooler than being an astronaut?

 

It's weird, i was considering taking up golf because of this thread. I guess i am susceptible to peer pressure. Especially when it comes from my watmm brothers.

 

Thankfully coalbucket's cynical comment shook me out of my delusory haze.

 

 

do it man. it is the best sport hands down. you can play from 8 to 80. it gets you out of the house in the fresh in with your friends. there are no women allowed. what other sport can you play in which you are playing your friend for money yet you are rooting for your friend to do well at the same time? and you call your own fouls. it's a gentleman's game, played by gentlemen.

 

I can think of better ways to spend 5 hours and 100 bucks

5 hours and 100 bucks now consists of diapers, wipes and a 3 naps buddy

My exgirlfriend of over 5 years had a family i love. Her mother is awesome and she loved me cause i laughed at her terrible jokes because they were so terrible. Her father was annoying because he thought he knew everything about everything. He once tried to tell me how to manage my diabetes. I was insulted. I asked him if, given the fact that I have had diabetes for over half my of life, he had any more advice for me, given his knowledge on the subject, he told me to pray. This was near the end of my relationship. It was like an apple trying to tell an orange how to be an orange ffs. And this happened with everything. He tried to tell me how to cook even though i've never seen him hold a kitchen utensil other than a fork or spoon.

I once laughed at church and he didn't talk to me for a couple of weeks. But I still love them folks.

yeah... my father in law tries to give me advice... First I zone out, but if he continues I get fidgety and irritable.

It was too personal for me to shrug it off as i usually do. I don't think he understood that i was just mocking him.

Man... I came back tonight in hopes that Fred would have more Mother In Law Misadventures!

when you blow in your daughter's face(not like that sickos!), she will automatically breathe in deeply and hold her breath. this is how you can safely dunk her under the water when you take her to the pool.

i don't have to suffer the outlaws staying with us cos mum-outlaw can't stay anywhere other than her own house. thankyou accute irrational phobias! just as well cos i couldn't handle it. at the most we get 4 hour visits.

dad outlaw will always disappear somewhere in our house and i'll find him just staring intensely at my tiling job in the bathroom or at the wallpaper in our bedroom.

i want to know why fred's MIL has 2 phones... around here it normally means you are a drug dealer.

my mil keeps her cell turned off. she will turn it on, call my wife to ask her what time she needs to be at the house to babysit and then turn her phone completely off again.

she hovers over my wife while my wife breastfeeds. the nursing room is a little sitting room attached to our bedroom. so i wake up this morning with my mother in law hovering over my wife feeding my daughter. she very well could have come into the room while i have morning wood, i dont even know. but she's just standing there, hovering, saying nothing, doing nothing. there is no privacy anymore. i can get her to abruptly leave her hovering post if i get out of bed and walk around in my boxers though. she scurries out.

I think you should just start walking around the house nude. See how long it is before they decide to leave.

  On 7/29/2011 at 7:06 PM, patternoverlap said:

I think you should just start walking around the house nude. See how long it is before they decide to leave.

srsly man you've got to create the awkward situations if she can't stand it. at least she has some sort of social awareness and she's not trying to have some normal convo with you while you're standing in your skivvies

I really want to leave a full post, but I'll be good and just leave half a post.

*half-post*

*knocks everything over*

*swears like a sailor*

*leaves thread*

fuck

last post

  On 7/29/2011 at 8:04 PM, Velazquez said:

I really want to leave a full post, but I'll be good and just leave half a post.

 

 

*half-post*

 

 

*knocks everything over*

*swears like a sailor*

*leaves thread*

 

fuck

last post

HALF POST!

FULL POST!

my MIL is singing out of tune in this roaring 20's old people's vibrato

LOL.

  On 7/29/2011 at 9:27 PM, Fred McGriff said:

FULL POST!

 

my MIL is singing out of tune in this roaring 20's old people's vibrato

tell her baph sez "hi gwen"

just leave porn running on your computer at full volume.

preferably milf porn if she is into deciphering subtle messages.

if not, midget on farm animal porn should get the point across.

My MIL took care of our kids today when my wife and went on a much needed dinner and a movie date (actually lunch and a dinner). We come back and she tells us in her annoying spanish voice about a spider chasing the kids around that she had to kill and that we should look out for more spiders.

  On 7/29/2011 at 11:13 AM, keltoi said:

when you blow in your daughter's face(not like that sickos!), she will automatically breathe in deeply and hold her breath. this is how you can safely dunk her under the water when you take her to the pool.

 

i don't have to suffer the outlaws staying with us cos mum-outlaw can't stay anywhere other than her own house. thankyou accute irrational phobias! just as well cos i couldn't handle it. at the most we get 4 hour visits.

 

dad outlaw will always disappear somewhere in our house and i'll find him just staring intensely at my tiling job in the bathroom or at the wallpaper in our bedroom.

 

i want to know why fred's MIL has 2 phones... around here it normally means you are a drug dealer.

Everyone in China seemingly has two phones. On the subway you see them playing games on one and texting on the other.

they have more phones than children in china

they want to visit i do not want them to visit they will visit anyways

  On 7/28/2011 at 12:41 AM, The Overlook said:

 

"That wine was cheap shit, Fred."

Is that Zoila from Flipping Out?

I know these things.

omg i was right it is i just looked at the jpg name. can't phase me.

  On 7/30/2011 at 4:00 PM, thanks robert moses said:

  On 7/28/2011 at 12:41 AM, The Overlook said:

 

"That wine was cheap shit, Fred."

 

 

Is that Zoila from Flipping Out?

 

 

I know these things.

 

omg i was right it is i just looked at the jpg name. can't phase me.

I was waiting for somebody to notice. I love Flipping Out. The plastic surgery episodes were golden.

  On 7/30/2011 at 5:41 AM, asymmetrical head said:

dinner and a movie date (actually lunch and a dinner). We come back and she tells us in her annoying spanish voice about a spider chasing the kids around that she had to kill and that we should look out for more spiders.

1) u hungry bro!

2) revenge of V-PROC!!

My soon to be father in law has owed me 200$ for about 3 weeks now for a kitchen rehab we did. I need it desperately. I think he gambled it away.