pub roleplay thread

*stumbles in, programs jukebox to play the whole of lady gaga's album 'the fame', without the piano tracks, orders Piña colada, realises pub is empty*

i'm still here, you might not have noticed me, i've been trying to avoid the absinthe.

oh hello modey, you can have the maraschino cherry from my Piña colada if you want

no thanks, where are the pistachios

there's only cashews

*fires up the jukebox*

can i get some cranberry juice, no ice?

1 yukon jack and lllllime plllllease :arrr:

*starts game of darts on the back of some old guy's head*

theres a darts game in the shape on the opposite side..you might have missed it. One side is baseball and the other is regular darts..any takers?

what about a mix of baseball and darts? the batter holds a specially marked bat, and the pitcher throws a dart at the batter, hoping to either get a good spot on the bat, or puncture one of the batter's eyeballs.

I'm a few beers into the game, keep it simple..or i might go into the corner and turn the head phones on. hahah

TO ALL MY FRIENDS!!

I'll have an invigorate please.

have i missed sunday pub lunch?

*slumps at the bar*

*orders a pint of magners and a shot of whisky*

*tells the chavs in the corner to shut the fuck up*

I make a steaming shit in the middle of the floor.

why the fuck do you have 2 yorkshire puddings and i only have one? this carvery is wack yo

seriously, this is bullshit. cut that second one in half... mate, fucking cut it in half... ill give you all my parsnips too... look, just fucking cut it in half will you? christ.

*cuts pub in half*

there u go mate

I have no yorkshire pudding, cut it into thirds, cunt.

wtf is yorkshire pudding?

is that like worcestershire sauce?

lol, omg someone help me explain this, it is like a savoury cake, I dont really know how to describe it, like pastry, but not pastry.

http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/yorkshi...ing,745,RC.html

its the best part of a sunday roast... fluffy crunchy buttery gravy cups.

*gorges on Yorkshires and nods off in the corner with a half-drank pint of ale*