pub roleplay thread

*rolls dice*

STOPPIT'S

GIB

CUTS

i'll be interested to see what cheeses you select.

i have a tesco club card but it was a cardboard one and it's been in the washing machine

edit: you should get some of those small scotch eggs that aren't allowed to be called scotch eggs, forgotten what they call them

I'M BACK

I got some cheddar, brie, stilton, wensleydale and roquefort.

AND some of the little scotch eggs that aren't allowed to be called scotch eggs

AND I got some crackers

AND it's double clubcard points on cranberry juice, yo

*rolls dice*

AUTOPILOT EATS ALL THE BRIE

IT'S DELICIOUS

YES

can i get a vodka cran with some scotch eggs

Sir Winston has my back up jib, who the fuck let those wankers in here? Anyway they seem to have gone now. Can I get a Strongbow please, fuck this day.

*pours george a strongbow*

i'll have you know this pub is located in Berrow-Clutton Goathurst and you just made yourself look like the massive tosser. we have fighting cider, wonky cider or sleeping cider. all non-carbonated.

oh shit, then what did I just pour?

DON'T DRINK IT GEORGE, IT MIGHT BE WONKY

that was a bottle Bob whizzed into last night - he's got an urinary tract infection too!

*guffaws*

*has coughing fit*

  abusivegeorge said:

Sir Winston has my back up jib, who the fuck let those wankers in here? Anyway they seem to have gone now. Can I get a Strongbow please, fuck this day.

  Stoppit said:

*pours george a strongbow*

*pours strongbow over Stoppit's head* what the fuck you doing man?

*slices a piece of stilton*

*looks for a towel*

*orders cheese platter with cheese*

  tauboo said:

  abusivegeorge said:

Sir Winston has my back up jib, who the fuck let those wankers in here? Anyway they seem to have gone now. Can I get a Strongbow please, fuck this day.

 

 

  Stoppit said:

*pours george a strongbow*

*pours strongbow over Stoppit's head* what the fuck you doing man?

 

 

*slices a piece of stilton*

Thanks Tauboo, I probably would have drunk it as well if it weren't for that, perhaps I'd better stick to the coke. Pint of coke please.

sorry george

my bad

sorry but abusivegeorge, unlike weed, is an actual recovering alcoholic and if he's going drink anything it shouldn't be cider

Thats alright mate, you weren't to know, its nice to know I'm well looked after though :).

Yep- thanks again Tauboo, people actually care here!

I think we should all just enjoy some nice cheese

*sees space where brie used to be*

damn you, autopilot!

*shakes fist*

Lol, don't worry he will be sick soon, and then we can have that.

*rolls dice*

PUTRID CHEESE & BEER DIARRHEA

  autopilot said:

*rolls dice*

 

PUTRID CHEESE & BEER DIARRHEA

MAKES FOR A BAD IDEA.

*rolls dice*

SPHINCTER CONSTITUTION OF +20 CAUSES THE FECES TO SHOOT OUT IN A FINE HIGH POWERED STREAM LIKE SOMEONE PUTTING THEIR THUMB OVER A FAUCET

IT SMOTHERS WEED'S UNCONCIOUS, NAKED BODY

STOPPIT PUSHES HER OUTSIDE WITH A POOL CUE

IT TAKES 45 MINUTES

  autopilot said:

*rolls dice*

 

SPHINCTER CONSTITUTION OF +20 CAUSES THE FECES TO SHOOT OUT IN A FINE HIGH POWERED STREAM LIKE SOMEONE PUTTING THEIR THUMB OVER A FAUCET

 

IT SMOTHERS WEED'S UNCONCIOUS, NAKED BODY

 

STOPPIT PUSHES HER OUTSIDE WITH A POOL CUE

 

IT TAKES 45 MINUTES

Gimme that book . . . 

*surveys cover and contents*

You've been reading from the 2girl1cup book, you jerk!

*hands over "Pub Antics Masquerade" book*

*rolls dice*

WE ALL ENJOY A FEW PINTS AND SOME GOOD MUSIC

I had two cans of Stella, it is enough to beat any man to death just for looking at you. I hate that drink.