pub roleplay thread

*THWACK*

Sorry Fred, had to knock you out mate, Come back in half hour, go shoot some Meth or something to chill the fuck out.

AUTO PARRY

FRED DODGES THE BLOW

*converts hydrogen into helium, eats peanuts*

*orders a cranberry juice*

*converts cranberry juice to helium*

*orders cranberry juice*

*notices battered old edirol midi keyboard connected to a laptop with a steinway piano vst on it in the corner, plays shit on it

*converts helium to methane*

*converts methane to cranberry juice*

*serves patrons*

*slams laptop lid*

whiskey please

fucking whiskey then

come on

it's friday

*GETS REALLY FUCKING DEMANDING*

Hey autopilot, how good are the chances of casting Repair on the bar?

  abusivegeorge said:

*converts sports car into bar strops*

*DEMANDS FUCKING*

  Betty said:

*DEMANDS FUCKING*

The brothel is downstairs and next door.

*converts Betty to helium*

  OneToThirtySix said:

Hey autopilot, how good are the chances of casting Repair on the bar?

*rolls dice*

What bar? You guys are on the moon. There's no atmosphere.

*orders a whore*

That'll be 10,000 Microsoft Offworld Space Credits.

*unzips his pants*

  autopilot said:

*rolls dice*

 

What bar? You guys are on the moon. There's no atmosphere.

Now you're just being ridiculous.

I'm not the one on the moon.

*sends autopilot to the moon, eats peanuts*

  autopilot said:

I'm not the one on the moon.

Substantiate this claim or STFU.

Well...

I can't not prove I'm on the moon...

Fuck.